Am I in a toxic friendship?

When is a friendship considered toxic?


I've recently took a step back from a friendship after realizing that this "friend" has always made comments that put me down and put my possessions down. He's always say things that made what I had look bad even though in reality it was better than what he had, and I felt he couldn't fully be supportive and happy for what I had. He'd always make comments to put me down but follow up with a comment that would make it seem like he was joking. He'd also compare what he had with what I had, and basically whatever I had he could get too but he just doesn't want to because it's not that great anyways type of thing. I never really noticed this kind of behavior before because he didn't work out of the same city that we grew up in before, he'd travel a lot and work in different countries for a few years. But due to the pandemic, he was stuck here and we ended up spending more time together and that's when I noticed this personality trait that I don't actually enjoy having around me. The negative comments that he makes makes me feel like all the work I put in for what I have isn't worth it. He also likes to talk himself up a lot, and just unnecessarily brag about himself when no one asks for it. So I recently confronted him about how I feel about the way he treats me and the comments he makes about me and things related to me, and he defends himself saying that he speaks to me that way as a way to show affection and endearment. But he says that he's been trying to change, it's just that he's been that way for so long it's hard for him to change. But for me knowing him for over ten years, I honestly haven't seen any change in him, it's probably only gotten worst over the years. I understand there is a little teasing among friends here and there, but his comments have basically gone overboard. And everything sentence that comes out of his mouth is like a backhanded compliment, if not just a slap in the face type comment. But he'd add a "haha, I kid" after to make it seem like he was joking. After confronting him about his comments and such, I haven't really spoken to him. I think it took me this long to break away from this friendship just because I kept thinking "we've known each other so long, it would be a waste of a friendship", but self growth also includes cutting people that are not there to support you in your journey of becoming someone better. Have I made the right choice of cutting him out of my life? Or will time actually change him?

0 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

We all get a little lonely now and then, especially during a pandemic. What are your experiences with online dating during this time, or even before the pandemic? What difference do you see in online